Rudder4Life Blog
ACEs Don’t Define You — They Explain Your Wounds!
Imagine you’re driving down the N1 when suddenly your car starts pulling to the left. You could ignore it and struggle with the steering wheel every day, or you could take it to a mechanic who lifts the vehicle and discovers the real problem—a bent axle from a pothole you hit months
How Families Cast Their Children in Roles They Never Auditioned For
You know that feeling when you’re stuck in traffic on the N1, and everyone’s playing their part perfectly? The taxi driver is weaving through lanes, the Sunday driver crawling in the fast lane, the aggressive BMW tailgating everyone, each person locked into their role like it’s written in stone. Now imagine your
Escaping the Grip of Codependency
Are you stuck in a never-ending cycle, trapped on a treadmill that won’t stop? You pour every ounce of energy into making those around you happy, but the emptiness inside only grows. If this hits home, you might be caught in the grip of codependency: a silent epidemic that entangles millions without
How to Make Your Values Play Nice Together
Values: Part Four of a Five Blog Series The practical art of orchestrating multiple values so they enhance rather than undermine your life Bongiwe sits in her principal’s office, staring at the letter in her hands. It’s her dream job offer—head of curriculum development for an innovative charter school network. Everything she’s
When Values War: Your Complete Guide to Impossible Choices!
Values: Part Five of a Five Blog Series Why value conflicts are actually growth opportunities—and the toolkit for making decisions you won’t regret It’s 2 am, and Michael hasn’t slept. His best friend of twenty years asked him to lie to his wife about where he was last weekend. Not a harmless
Why Your Favourite Value is Sabotaging Your Happiness
Values: Part Three of Five Blog Series How over-relying on one “good” value creates unexpected problems—and why you need a portfolio approach. Meet Bongani, the achievement machine. Twenty years of climbing every ladder—valedictorian, cum laude, youngest VP in company history. His LinkedIn reads like a success masterclass. His wife left him two
The Three Hungers Your Soul Can’t Ignore
Values: Part Two And why most people are unknowingly starving at least one of them What does success truly mean in a world where appearances can be deceiving? Meet Thembi, a 35-year-old marketing director who, by all external measures, has “made it.” With a six-figure salary, a corner office, and an impressive
Your Emotional Thermostat is Running Your Life!
Why identical situations create completely different emotions—and what this reveals about the hidden force controlling your happiness Part One of a Five Blog Series What if the very thing you’ve worked hard for turns out to be your worst nightmare? Consider this: two colleagues, Sarah and Mike, both receive the same promotion
Systems Thinking Iceberg Model: Understanding Complex Teen Social Issues
What if the seemingly simple act of a teenager scrolling through social media at 02h00, tears streaming down their face, after seeing another “perfect” post from a classmate, reveals a far more complex reality lurking beneath the surface? When a parent walks in and instinctively responds with, “Put that phone away and
Life Strategies Blog Series: Stop Playing Victim, Start Playing to Win
Life Strategies Part One Is Your Life Just a Game of Chance? Are you treating your life like a slot machine, hoping for some lucky break? Have you ever wondered why, despite all the self-help books and motivational seminars you’ve consumed, your life still feels like it’s stuck on repeat? The self-help
Maintenance Mode: How to Stay the CEO When Life Wants You Back as an Employee
Life Strategies Conclusion The Honeymoon Phase Is Over. Now What? You’ve implemented the Life Laws. You’ve set boundaries. You’ve taken accountability. You’re starting to see results. Congratulations—you’ve graduated from victim to victor status. Now comes the hard part: staying there. Life has a way of testing your commitment to your new way
Your 30-Day Life Takeover Plan (Warning: Side Effects Include Success)
Life Strategies Part 5 Stop Treating Change Like a Hobby Most people approach life change like they approach learning to play the guitar—they buy the instrument, play a few chords when motivated, then let it gather dust in the corner. Six months later, they wonder why they’re not concert-ready. Implementing Dr Phil’s